ALL THE LOVE

(Reposted from Face Book - 12/27/09) First and foremost, let me say thank you for the many kind words and condolences sent to me regarding my mother’s passing away. I am overwhelmed with gratitude for so many caring people in my life. It may seem odd that I would discuss this openly on a social networking site, like Face Book, but there is reason there, too. Since August of this year, there has been the death of two of my very close friends, barely a week apart, following closely on the death of another ‘acquaintance’, I shall call him, although our friendship was slowed only by how infrequently we crossed paths. Shortly after this series of sad events, a young and attractive local bartender, so quick to laugh and easy to speak to, took her own life. This sad, sad, news was simultaneous with the senseless death of my father, as an errant driver ran into him and killed him as he returned from visiting my Mom. She remained in nursing home these past four months, where she had gone for a broken hip and been found too ill to leave. She entered in to a coma on Christmas Eve, and finally passed the day after. My mother suffered from Vascular Dementia, as disease that cripples the blood vessels feeding the brain, causing symptoms not unlike Alzheimer’s. She made little sense day to day, and spoke mostly in whispers, to herself or others she imagined. She rarely recognized those who came to see her. Due to these conditions, the nursing staff was never told of my father’s death, as any slip would cause her undue torment, which she would then forget, and have to re-experience, again & again. They assure me, she was never told. About ten weeks ago, in a moment completely out of character, she clasped my brother-in-law’s arm, and looked him dead in the eye, speaking in a very clear voice; “My husband was in an accident. He’s dead and there’s nothing anybody can do about it. He’s with my mother and they’re coming to get me.” The knowing of his accident, alone, gives me chills. She was never told of these events, nor was it gauged within her abilities to speak so clearly or convey so sensibly. But there’s more. .. She went on to say that “…they’ll be coming for me in about two months.” Ten weeks later, here we are. So what has this to do with condolences and social networks? Everything. It is my belief that we are, all of us, connected. That the Universe around us is divided into two simple parts: Matter & Energy. And that all of that matter is an interchangeable field of atoms, made up of swirling sun-atomic particles, spinning in a sea of unified energy. I believe that this unified field has a collective consciousness, and that we, through our paltry human senses, catch glimpses of reality that we learn to use to fumble along, getting laid, sleeping, eating, starting wars, playing football, making art and some times praying to a personal god who’s name we happen to like, or whom we expect to give us our rewards for praying to them. There are times we see past the veil. There are times, perhaps, when someone gets so close to the edge of this reality we cling to, that they can see over that edge, where All Things Are True At Once. And they spill the beans for moment, causing, perhaps, philosophers to harangue each other, for generations, selling books and launching coffee houses, if not terrorist cults and churches. Then they are gone. This seems highly unnecessary. In the old days, we talked it out over the back fence. In these modern times, we do it here. This IS our back fence. Except it isn’t. It’s a network that reaches around the globe, and is generally unencumbered & uncensored (although I know there are exceptions). It’s a place where I can talk to my friends from anywhere this network reaches, or leave pictures and messages for their perusal. More often, it’s a place where people come to share their paltry, puny mortal human lives. Why? You might think it’s because we all have one. It’s also because that’s all we really have. Our lives. Our pain and love. Our pride and foolishness. Our success stories. The birth of children & ideas. And the loss of our families & loved ones. Everybody who responded to my post had one thing in common; Understanding loss and love, and offering that understanding. This is a place where reaching out is the lesson. Reaching out to see that we are too fragile, too isolated, too strong, too integrated… That we are all too human. This social network is a substitute for that unified field of connected consciousness. I hurt, and someone responds, because they, too, know this hurt. I love, and someone responds because they, too, have known love. I am alone, and someone responds because they, too, have known loneliness. Yet we are not alone. We are all connected. And by staying connected, by reaching out, by understanding that no matter what the language, the gender, the sexual orientation, the bank balance, we are all humans, living through the insane reality that we are able to see, we make our lives here a finer thing. We ad some elegance to the meat hook reality of birth and death. We learn. And if we really dig down deep, we love. Another Mad Poet once said these words: “I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together.” Nothing could be clearer. And nothing could be clearer to me than the love. Through all of these tragic events, so many have been here for me. And I for so many. Through heartbreak and salvation, a new union is formed. On screens & blackberrys, multitudes have reached out to one another to offer condolences, counseling, a shoulder to cry on, an ear to bend, a partner to drink with. It has been nothing short of amazing. Thank you all. You’ve made this so very much easier. And I do so very much hope that by leaving this out in the open, that one day, someone who needs this same comfort might stumble through here, as I have, and find what I have found. So again, thank you for The Love. And I don’t believe there’s a short supply, either. Sometimes, it’s just hard to know how to deliver it. I say, spread it around wherever you go. In any way you can. Because we’re all out here, living, just the same. So here’s to you. I love you all. Each and every one. Lord David Skull Club New Orleans