I am both humbled & honored at this, of course. Ashley was/is a hero to many of us, and I can't think of a more touching compliment than to even have my name mentioned in association with this. It is truly an honor, just as trying to live up to the caliber of commitment & honesty he demonstrated is humbling at best. In the spirit of that honesty, I have to be truthful here: I had no idea people actually read this shit. In fact, I never think about it, including now. Like messages in bottles tossed off a bridge or beach, I try to find & speak the truth, push 'send' and it just goes out there, somewhere, if only to balance out the great many untruths that are tossed asunder every minute of every day. Whether that generates an award or a bullet, I just do it. Somebody has to fucking do it. Or we're all screwed. So I just do it. Join me, won't you? The great thing about honesty is never having to waste a second remembering lies, or worrying about being found out. So come on. You know you want to. Just try it. And yes, I already know that those pants don't make my ass look fat. My ass does. And thanks, Cousin Pat, wherever you are. LD
Thursday, August 4, 2011
Both Humbled & Honored
I gotta call today from my friend, Sam. She told me I'd been nominated for the Ashley Morris Award.
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9 comments:
i'm so happy for you. and proud to call you my friend.
oh yes. i sure am.
xo
no one is more deserving of this award than you my dear friend.
i'm both honored and privileged to know you.
xo
Well, now. I see that the nomination Pat wrote for me, unsolicited and without my knowledge, of course, has been summarily deleted & withdrawn.
I guess somebody got the wrong smoke blown up their dress.
Whatever.
I suppose the blogosphere has as fragile an ego as the mayor & police chief, so who the fuck cares.
Next time, maybe you should read some of this shit & figure out who I am before tossing my name around, ya think?
LD
The lesson for me, here, of course, is in the penance of being lured by vanity, a luxury I avoid like the plague, as we are all of us, only human, and fraught with the peril of poor judgement and failure, day after vanity filled day.
But vanity it was that drew me, however briefly, into this, the Power and Approval of the Blogosphere, where vanity is the image on the coin of the realm.
I shall not trust in either of them again, I think. Only in the truth that can be plainly seen. For the promises made by the vain, in sharing their glory, are hollow and meaningless, whether they are kept or not.
August 29, 2011 10:26 PM
Bravo. Standing ovation for the last comment.
I should have emailed you about this when it happened.
While taking nominations, there was some concern raised about a completely different set of issues, and because of my position as an organizer and the comment moderator, I felt it would be inappropriate for me to nominate anyone for the award, so I removed my own nomination. I handled it clumsily, and for that, I apologize.
You were also nominated by at least one other individual on that comment thread, for many of the reasons I submitted your name in the first place. You have done some of the best and most important writing on the NOLA internets, especially this year. People have noticed, and no amount of red tape or conflict of interest by a novice comment moderator like me will change that.
Again, apologies.
When people start giving each other awards for blogging, it should be considered that they don't know how to run a fucking site.
Whatever the internal reason, I got painted with the 'Not Worthy' brush in a public forum.
Again.
To quote another erstwhile outsider, Keith Richards;
"Fuck all those clever bastards."
LD, I do get very frustrated by the "form vs. function" stuff, like removing that really beautifully written nomination because of some bizarre point of conflict of interest. I know Pat meant what he said, and means what he said in his apology.
That said, it seems silly and petty to remove that comment.
Note: I do appreciate being thought of in a positive light, which is why I let my thanks to Pat stand, rather than just deleting the whole mess.
On the other hand, it's sometimes difficult to see around a huge wad of self importance.
Who are any of these people to decide who & what is worthy of note?
To find the truth, in anything, one must step far outside the comfort zone of agreed upon beliefs. Only when one does the research themselves, does their opinion really matter.
Even a bird in a cage can repeat what it's told to repeat.
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